Gerrard really wishes Lilium didn't have an invisibility complex, and hates himself for the fact that he significantly contributed to it when he ignored her completely as they ran from the drow at the tournament. He has tried since then to visibly include her in situations, even going so far as to positively discriminate at times.
He finds her hard to read, and worries that she only thinks she is useful when undead are around. He wishes there was something more he could be doing to show how useful he found her presence all year long, whether it was keeping Rose sane, healing, brutalising undead or keeping the party members from slotting themselves. It's hard to be a jack of all trades in this world, but he thinks she did it within the scope of what he sees as Freedom's "jobs" - there was nothing she couldn't turn her hand to, and he was very happy to have someone like that to turn to.
He hasn't yet realised she died because she overcast to get him out.
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branchandroot
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Date: 2010-07-01 04:36 pm (UTC)He finds her hard to read, and worries that she only thinks she is useful when undead are around. He wishes there was something more he could be doing to show how useful he found her presence all year long, whether it was keeping Rose sane, healing, brutalising undead or keeping the party members from slotting themselves. It's hard to be a jack of all trades in this world, but he thinks she did it within the scope of what he sees as Freedom's "jobs" - there was nothing she couldn't turn her hand to, and he was very happy to have someone like that to turn to.
He hasn't yet realised she died because she overcast to get him out.