Date: 2011-06-18 10:44 am (UTC)
The question was asked how a woman could be compensating. I didn't say at the time, but it was perfectly obvious to me.

It wasn't your sword, though.

Not a single smile, fought in duels for no other reason than to try to impress, claimed a noble title as if that was all you needed to elevate yourself...desperate to please, desperate to be better than you were.

What happened to you that made you so entirely convinced of your own crass inadequacy?

You could fight well, you certainly weren't an idiot, I'm willing to guess that a lot of the time you weren't talking, you were thinking...you had a lot of the necessary elements already there and working well, so why then, whenever you had the opportunity to demonstrate otherwise, did you settle for merely compensating? Maybe your title will grant you what you need in order to have a modicum of self-confidence, but I doubt it, and even if it does, it shouldn't.

Stop trying to be what someone else thinks you should - it'll be a life-changing improvement.
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Doug Millington-Smith

June 2017

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