magicaddict | Damn, I've Been Busy...

...for most of it, doing very little of note.

The performance improvement event mentioned in the last update (the one my line manager dropped the not-so-subtle hint to me suggesting my broaching the issue of the fact that the senior management were blissfully unaware of the working practices inherent in the lower orders) was, as was more or less to be expected, a crock of shite. We went into it expecting nothing else, and for the most part, weren't surprised.
The format involves several brainstorming sessions in progressively smaller groups, after which each group concentrates on a certain issue that can be resolved locally (so anything involving a budget, IT solutions or "geographic changes" is out), and produces a short presentation to a "decision making panel" of three local senior managers, who say yes or no on the spot and nominate one of themselves, in public, to champion the proposal if it is accepted. There is a deliberately tight schedule to focus people's minds on the task.

Unfortunately, this otherwise very feasible strategy has been management consultancied up the ass.

On the first day, we successfully navigated our way through the buzzword bingo and were sneaking up on a good idea and presentation to follow. Then the second day came, and the presentation template came out.

All of a sudden, all of our ideas went out the window.

They literally gave us a set of blanks to fill in, and put a stop to our saying anything that wasn't expressly on the pages. No deviation, no imagination, nothing. The presenter would stand next to the flip chart, read the presentation verbatim and sit down. Our proposal was based around staff uncertainty over whether the work they were doing was correct. We had to quantify it into numbers - how the hell can you quantify into numbers something you aren't sure of the nature of, let alone the value?

Then I was pulled over to one side by my group's designated "facilitator" and asked if I could let the others have more of a hand in what we were doing, as they were in danger of being left out. How dare I get on with the task at hand while the two others (who didn't understand the concept of the event and didn't want to be there respectively) stood around looking blankly at the facilitator and barely acknowledging their, or my presence. How fucking dare.

Then they asked for feedback. Open, honest feedback. I imagine they expected management fluff. I gave them open, honest feedback. "Crass unwillingness to think outside the box", "how dare I deviate from the party line", and "I fear for my career - obviously a dangerous free thinker" were included in what I wrote, and I half expected to be sacked on Monday morning. Instead, there was an email from the facilitator, deftly ignoring what I said and praising what she had "helped us to achieve". All things considered, I suppose I should be happy I still have a job.
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Sunday's LARP invoved the party being thouroughly pwned for the first time in a while (not physically, but pwned nonetheless), and while I'm sure it was puzzling and slightly unfulfilling to those playing to be left in the middle of nowhere with two poisoned people and nothing looking to have been achieved, watching their abject confusion as they failed to come to any group conclusion was novel. We played a certain type of monster that do exactly that ("Lovers, not fighters" as they were described) and, to be honest, won the day. That alone may have made the game a failure on some levels, but there's always a strong possibility of hollow or lack of victory on in a game run by Tim, and it does a party good to be reminded once in a while that they don't have a handle on everything. Some parties could use it more often than others. This one got unlucky.
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Then Bex came to stay from Tuesday to Friday, and life was good. She and John (her husband, the chef, DIY man and all round nice guy throughout) brought food, drink and good company, and there was much rejoicing. He cooked sirloin steaks on the first night (cut from the sirloin he brought with him), and we all got drunk. Going in to work on Wednesday was bad. Very bad.

Then Valentines evening romance happened, and everything was better. Cinema trip first, followed by meal. The only film that fit into Emma and my schedules was Epic Movie, and while it certainly wasn't romantic, it was good fun regardless. Based mostly on Narnia, with vigorous nods in the direction of The Da Vinci Code, Willy Wonka, Nacho Libre, X-Men, Snakes on a Plane and Pirates of the Carribean, it wasn't quite as good as Scary Movie, but all the boxes were ticked and it's worth going to watch.
We then returned to The Hole in the Wall (visited the same time last year), and found ourselves choosing to eat the very same meal we had picked twelve months ago. The lack of variety was made up by remembering just how good it had been the first time, finding it was every bit as good this time around, the excellent company and the wonderfully intimate atmosphere. Highly recommended to romantic diners in Bath who want to splash out.
I gained a shiny new leather wallet from the evening, to replace the piece of canvas crap it was both too big to pull from my crombie pocket, and damned embarrassing to show off when it eventually did work free, and another beautiful card to put on display (ones from Emma are far too nice to throw away). She seemed happy with her session at the Spa, so the evening was called a success.

Thursday night came to a close for Emma and I relatively early, but the drinking session inspired by Bex and John's presence and various other guests invited for the evening, apparently progressed long into the night, coming to close with the final participants calling it a night around seven in the morning. The time Bex and I are able to spend together is always precious, and never long enough when it comes around. Between work and Valentines Day were were slightly strapped for it this week - must do better next time, but we got said a fair amount that needed it. Emma and I are going up to theirs next - always a pleasure, never a chore.

If nothing else, we get to enjoy John's cooking again.